Journal and Blog
I know a question we all ask over and over again. "Is this anxiety?" Or "Is this because I am too busy?" " I am a mom- isn't feeling overwhelmed part of it?"
At a conference with Margaret Wehrenberg, Psy.D she shared a concept about controlling too much activity something she called (TMA).
When we get caught up being "too busy" and over scheduled we limit our ability to learn to calm and exercise relaxation skills.
It is a phrase we use all the time, somethings we mean it, but most the time we just it to cover up how we really feel. Think about how you use the phrase in these 2 negative ways.
A Locked Door
Saying "I am fine" in interpersonal relationships isn't the same as saying it to someone offering to help you to your car with groceries. Using "I am fine" as a way to shut someone out damages close relationships. "I am fine" is like putting a lock on a door or a closed sign in the middle of the road. It prevents communication, limits growth and connection. Sometimes we aren't ready to "go there" and we need emotional space. In those situations try expressing those thoughts instead if using "I am fine."
As a Mask
"I am fine" can become a mask we hide behind. This not only isolates ourselves from genuine love and support but also isolates ourselves from genuine love Think about how you use it as a mask- Do you use it as a way to protect or conceal? Think about the times you wear it, and the situations when you take it off? awareness is a key ingredient for emotional well-being. "I am fine" isn't always a mask you wear to hide. Sometimes wearing this mask is the only thing holding us together.
Make sure that when you use the phrase "I am fine" you understand why you are using it. Sometimes saying "I am fine." Becomes a voice of surrender. "It's fine" becomes a desperate choice not to care. Don't allow "I am fine" become the phase that silents your needs.